Tuesday, August 18, 2009

An Explanation of Brett Favre

I think that at this point, it is fitting to break out this blog's first ever Star Wars analogy to explain Brett Favre's recent decision to join the Vikings. In Return of the Jedi Obi Wan explains the turn of Anakin Skywalker to the dark side saying, "Your father was seduced by the dark side of the Force. He ceased to be Anakin Skywalker and became Darth Vader. When that happened, the good man who was your father was destroyed."

And so it goes with Favre. I have maintained ever since he went back to the Jets that Brett Favre is a retired Packers legend. And he still is. No number of games in a Vikings uniform will erase the happy memories of the Favre glory days in Green Bay. In fact, Brett Favre hasn't actually played an NFL game since the NFC Championship loss to the Giants in 2008. After Brett Favre's retirement, an entirely new character surfaced: Darth Favre. Just like Anakin Skywalker, Brett Favre was no more when he left Green Bay. He was reborn as a villain. Of course, I believe there is still good in this nefarious Darth Favre character. Just as Vader was redeemed in the end of Return of the Jedi after his son defeated him, so will Favre turn back towards the light after Aaron Rodgers and the Packers put a couple of whoopings on the Vikings this season. Favre will enter Canton as a redeemed Packer. A Packers legend, just like he's always been.

Oh. And after he dies, I think he gets to stick around as one of those cool blue ghosty things like in Star Wars.

Monday, July 13, 2009

Just Watching the College Kids

I'm at work right now. I'm sitting at a desk again. The program I'm working for right now is a bunch of "high-level, mid career professionals" who are here finishing up work on their Masters degrees in International Relations. Some of them are lawyers, some are high up in big non-profits, some are successful in business. Tomorrow, they have a final exam. I guess most of them are panicking, worrying that they are not at all prepared for the test. A group of them is currently congregated around the front desk, anxiously gossiping about the exam. They are saying things like, "Ugh. I wish the professor had made that more clear in the lecture!" and "It's 9:30 and I haven't even started studying yet." and "Well, the exam should be over by 1:00 tomorrow, so I imagine we'll all be drunk by 2:00." I'm pretty sure that these people are all just undergraduates in disguise.

Friday, July 3, 2009

Dear Me, I Think It's Time to Post Again

Inspired by the great blogosphere stalwart Jon Terrasi, I'm going to start trying to make more posts up in here. Here it goes.

I'm sitting at a lonely desk shift in Tilton Hall tonight. The only bonus, I'm Tilton is home to one of the summer English language programs, so there's plenty of magazines down here that the kids are theoretically supposed to read to help them learn English. Except you'd be surprised at the magazines that they use for this purpose. The selection includes among others, The Economist, The New England Journal of Medicine, The New Yorker, and The North Texan: The North Texas University Alumni Magazine. However, there are a couple of copies of Sports Illustrated down here, so those are the magazines I've been turning to (although I have nothing against The Economist and The New Yorker has the occasional story that interests me).

So I'm reading the latest issue of S.I. and I find a piece by Utah Republican Senator Orrin Hatch regarding Congressional intervention in the BCS. As I read, I was at first amused and shocked by the blatant hypocrisy in the article. It's linked here. Read it. Then continue reading the post.

So. Why does this register pretty high on my hypocrisy scale? Because Hatch's argument for the opening up of the BCS to allow a fair opportunity to all schools sounds like something a liberal democrat would use to argue in favor of healthcare reform or education reform or tax reform.

Just as Senator Hatch says that, "Because of their increased visibility and status BCS schools also receive an unfair advantages in recruiting top players and coaches." A democrat might say that public schools in rich neighborhoods have an unfair advantage over those in poor areas because their high real estate values mean higher property taxes which means that more money flows to the schools in those areas. He says that, "In addition, every team from a preferred conference automatically receives a share from an enormous pot of revenue generated by the BCS, even if they fail to win a single game. On the other hand, teams from the less-favored conferences are guaranteed to receive a much smaller share, no matter how many games they win. The numbers are staggering. Last year the Mountain West Conference had one team qualify for the BCS, Utah, as did three of the automatic-bid conferences. Yet under the BCS formula the Mountain West received $9.8 million—roughly half of what the three bigger conferences got. And despite having the nation's only other undefeated team, Boise State, the Western Athletic Conference received just $3.2 million in BCS revenue." Isn't that just a typical democratic argument for a "more level economic playing field" rehashed with some collegiate sports terms added. A Republican on the campaign trail say something like, Senator Hatch wants to redistribute the wealth in college football, thus changing the natural equilibrium that the market has created after 100 years of college football competition. The best solution to this problem is for the government to stay out of the way as the ingenious and hard-working Americans of the N.C.A.A. do their jobs. Of course, then, pundits would accuse Hatch of athletic socialism.

Now, there's something else here that I haven't mentioned yet. Orrin Hatch is from Utah. This year, the University of Utah Utes were undefeated after beating Alabama in the Sugar Bowl, yet they were denied the chance to play for the national title because the B.C.S. did not place them in the national championship game. Maybe, as a college football fan, Senator Hatch doesn't like the B.C.S. system and would like to see it changed or gone. But does anyone out there genuinely think that he would have written an article in SI or called for Congressional hearings if it hadn't been a school in his state? If he was from Florida, home of the national champion Gators, does anyone think he would complain? Government regulation and oversight of the B.C.S. goes against everything that Hatch stands for politically, but attacking the B.C.S. for denying the Utes the chance to play for the national title is a great way to score non-partisan political points back home.

I guess the point is that Hatch can't have it both ways like this. If you think that the government should intervene in something as trivial as college football, don't you think they should also intervene in issues as critical as education and healthcare?

Saturday, May 16, 2009


So I'm sitting at a front desk in South Hall working the 12:00am-8:00am graveyard shift. I'm pretty bored. My only entertainment has been a 2 hour video chat with Rory, she's an extremely boring person. Anyway, I was just wondering where all the blog posts went. I mean, there used to be a stream of a few posts a week overall, and now, it's just Santera and my mom writing new stuff. People twitter a lot and stuff, but I was a really big fan of the blogs.

Friday, April 10, 2009

Jeff Peacemaker Fisher

Right now, I'm staying at a hotel in New York City with the whole Harrison family. By around midnight everyone was asleep, so I went down to the hotel lobby to do a little reading because we all know that midnight ain't that late. I sit down on a couch, the only seat available, next to a man wearing corduroy pants, a corduroy sport coat, wingtips, and a bright orange corduroy button down shirt. He was about 55 and had a beard that looked as if it hadn't been shaved in a couple of weeks. As I sat down, he was drawing crazy pictures on some paper he had in his hand, but he immediately took an interest in me and asked me where I was from, kicking off a fantastic conversation which I would be remiss not to detail on this blog.

Figuring his first question harmless, I told him I was from Wisconsin. He told me it was the best state ever, and that it would be even better once Brett Favre was playing for the Packers again. Suddenly, Jeff is seeming like an awesome guy. I tell him that it would be awesome if Favre played for the Packers again, but I wasn't sure it would happen. At this point, he turned to me and guaranteed that Brett Favre and the Packers would win the Super Bowl this year. I asked why he was so confident and he responded, "Because Brett Favre is the most driven born winner since Jesus Christ."

I had absolutely no way to respond to Jeff's statement. But it wasn't a problem. Jeff was very good at continuing the conversation. He went on to tell me about his close personal relationship with God, and at this point handed me the drawing he had made which I will post just as soon as I can get access to a scanner. Then, Jeff and I proceeded to talk politics. I decided to let Jeff do the talking and avoided telling him about my support of President Obama, which was a good decision considering the direction in which the conversation then turned. Jeff suddenly broke into a long speech supporting Ron Paul as the next Vice President of the United States in the 2012 election. I asked him why he had Paul in the VP spot rather than the top job. Who would be the President? He said that he would tell me who would be President but I had to keep it a secret. Jeff would be President in 2012. Then of course, in his 2016 reelection, Ron Paul would not want to seek another term as Vice President, so Jeff would run with Dennis Kucinich. I proceeded to ask Jeff why he thought Paul would make his a winning ticket and he gave me two reasons: one, Jesus; two, he cited the statistic that if the Presidential election of Ron Paul against Barack Obama were held today, Paul would win 38 million votes. I pointed out that 38 million votes wouldn't be enough to get the Presidency for Ron Paul, but Jeff insisted that it would be impossible for Obama to win another election; his political career ended as soon as he signed the PATRIOT Act. I let this point go.

Then, Jeff sharply tacked back to football. He once again told me how great Brett Favre would be on the Packers. This time, he backed it up by saying that he knew a thing or two about football. "You know, I turned down an NFL contract from the Chicago Bears in 2006?" Remember, Jeff was about 55 by my estimates. I flat out told him that I didn't believe him. He said that he had since fallen out of shape, but back then he could kick field goals from the 40 yard line and never miss. Now he can only make them from the 30. Also, he could then, and still can fly. He claims to run a 4.7 in the 40 yard dash. Once again, I conceded the point.

Again, Jeff suddenly switched the topic. This time, he asked me when I personally realized that Jesus Christ was my lord and savior. I honestly responded that I had no idea how to answer that question. Maybe I had yet to be enlightened or touched by some higher power. He told me that I was living proof of Jesus. I didn't know when Jesus became my savior because I didn't remember. Because Jesus had been my savior since the moment of conception. Again, the point was conceded.

Jeff quickly swung the topic back to politics. He told me that he was a strict constitutionalist, his main reason for supporting Ron Paul. As I failed to respond to his questions, he assumed that I was a constitutionalist too and told me I should run for Congress to promote constitutionalism. He even promised to get me endorsed by Ron Paul. At this point, I sharply replied that the Constitution explicitly stated that you have to be 25 to run for Congress, so I was ineligible. I thought that I finally had him cornered. But he told me that there was an imminent Constitutional crisis in which Al Gore would rise to the Presidency and the minimum age for being in Congress would change to represent the voting age. I promised him that the moment Al Gore was President, I would throw my hat into the ring.

After talking about Jesus a little more, Jeff said he had to go use one of the public computers in the hotel lobby to tell the whole world about what an enlightened soul I was. I figured I should do the same. I checked out some of the youtube links that Jeff told me to go to. They are very representative of our conversation, so I'm putting them here.

Enjoy. Peace.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Tufts at Dawn

Great night tonight. Stayed up all night doing work, but it was effortless. I was just sitting on top of the library roof, writing an awesome paper, I was feelin' it. Just about right as I finished, the sun came up. I had my camera in my bag so I walked around and snapped some pictures...

View from the Library roof.

Looking down at Miner and the Victory Steps.

Rising Jumbo.


Freshly painted cannon, courtesy of Tufts Mock Trial.

Saturday, April 4, 2009

Some Thoughts on Progress

First off, congratulations to the entire state of Iowa. Kind of makes Wisconsin look even worse for the 2006 Constitutional Amendment. Let's hope that Iowa sparks us to turn that around.
Second, does anyone think that running on social conservatism could be a viable GOP strategy in 2012? Or ever again?